Am I insensitive?

Nov 4, 2014 by     1 Comment     Posted under: Opinions

I felt terrible today since I woke up. It’s just one of those days when you feel like lying in your bed all day watching back to back episodes of your drama series or reading a novel. Whenever I feel like this, I question myself as for the reason of this complex feeling. Maybe it’s because I failed my test yesterday or PMS. I passed the entire day with my laptop accomplishing nothing at all, completely failing at attempts to get that sinking feeling out of me.

This became a more difficult task than usual as the evening approaches and I hear the news of the devastating blast at Wagha Border. t appeared as a news update on a page on Facebook. The only way to avoid getting more updates was to shut down all social media sites. And I did exactly that.

Another hour passed, and I felt uncomfortable of consciously trying not to hear the news channels running their latest story as my family watched the television. I finally took my place in front of the television after another half hour’s fight to stay away from the news.

Fifty people? Fifty? How can fifty people have died in one blast, one minute? Wasn’t that a thing of the past? Only 2-5 people are killed in the minor blasts these days. Has the series of vicious bomb blasts started again in Pakistan, and that too during Moharram? These were some questions that started racing in my mind.

I didn’t want to hear about more sorrows today, I was already depressed so I switched the channel and started watching a movie. Fifteen minutes into the movie and the realization hit me that I was being insensitive. Fifty people lost there lives today, hundreds were injured and traumatized for life and I can’t even be sensitive enough to hear what has happened or even pray for them.

This is becoming a pattern. People who are now in their 20’s were practically raised watching news regarding bomb blasts, target killings and mass killings. The sad music that news channels play whenever something of this sort happens, can make us depressed without any reason. It’s not the fault of the media because it’s their job to report it. It’s not our fault that we watch it because we feel it’s the only thing that we can do aside from praying. We know that watching the news isn’t of any help to the victims but we feel comforted to at least have some connection with those people. Though we can avoid being traumatized or depressed, but we still choose it so as to not feel guilty from within.

I feel ill at ease today because I chose to watch the movie instead of the news. I chose to overlook people dying because I wanted to cheer up my mood. I constantly switched between the news and movie channels but I didn’t think I could handle the emotional stress any more. I don’t think our nation can take it in any more. We are becoming depressed and just to avoid the depression we are becoming insensitive. We desperately want peace.

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1 Comment + Add Comment

  • Sometimes, we are so insecure to accept our surrounding somehow we got fed up.
    need a drastic change …my thoughts

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