Did I just FALL in love?! Again?

Jan 8, 2013 by     No Comments    Posted under: Opinions

Though love is supposed to be something really personal and sudden, it gets you thinking if most of the youth tends to fall in love every other day. You can fall in love with a person you just met or saw or you may wake up one fine day and realize that you’re in love with your best friend. Then again love is easy to find and lose these days. We have been growing up watching perfect romances in movies, but now it’s normal to have several relationships and a few breakups in your baggage.

Love and its experiences cannot be the same for everybody and it’s not easy to generalize the feelings, however for me ‘contemporary’ love has a rather fascinating and cheeky analogy. Like Dane Cook says: ‘When you’re not in love it’s like there’s a party going on and you’re not invited and you happen to pass by that house in the rain and you’re like “oh! I wasn’t invited…” That’s what it feels like but then again when you’re in love it’s like you’re inside that party going “Where’s my jacket?  I wanna get out of here. I wanna go and see other parties”’

It’s like a fever; it captures you quick, stays for a while and then comes off just as quickly.

What is it that makes us go into that party and then makes us want to go back out?

Why do we need such a heavy and frequent dose of love?

Maybe it’s what we get from the media, all the stars fall in love…or wanting to experience what we have been watching all our lives, for example; most movies from Disney that are about falling in love. ‘Sleeping Beauty’, ‘Snow White’, ‘Lady and the Tramp’, ‘Cinderella’, ‘Beauty and the Beast’ and so on. When we become teenagers, we want to know what love is all about, we get tired of the instability in the world, we feel like loosening up and finding peace in that one person or it’s the need to provide ourselves with the happiness and satisfaction of being heard and understood which we don’t get at home anymore or that attraction we have towards the other gender, with our hormones going haywire, all this makes us feel love at an accelerated rate and we develop heavy likenesses and get driven for good looks and those dramatizations and fantasies that we have made in our minds about love. We think we’re going to be alone all our lives if we don’t find someone to stick with now. We have that little thing in our minds called self-esteem and if we think someone doesn’t love us, that we are losers, and that no one will ever love us. Or maybe it’s just that human need of wanting to belong or wanting to get involved with someone, sharing your life with someone and having somebody to offer love, care and affection! Sometimes it’s only that peer pressure which we can’t avoid because a lot of times being single is frowned upon as though there is something wrong with you if you are not “attached”.

When the feelings are sudden and intense we tend to ignore the odds and go against them, we sometimes forget about making rational and realistic decisions and choose someone whom we cannot stick with in the long run. After we get to know the other person well enough, then there’s nothing left, no fantasy or curiosity anymore. In this age we are fickle minded, we tend to lose interest and it gets weary, boring and annoying and the fever starts to get off. It all gets old, uninteresting and childish and perhaps all of it starts to seem like ignorant endeavors. The other person may get too controlling, judgmental and narrow-minded, they might give you enough space to make your own decisions and lead your life your way. And then you try to escape and that’s where compassion, gentleness, attraction, fun, affection go missing and fear, agony, anger, distress, low-level emotions, interruption and some times, violence come in and that’s what kills a relationship.

Nevertheless, love is natural and is meant to happen. We just need to be rational and patient about it so that we can choose to be with someone who’s really worth it. Otherwise it’s amazing to have friends and family who are there for us, to talk to, to understand us and help us getting out of hard situations. Nobody wants to be alone and nobody should anyone be.

Right now, it’s our time to get out and experience life. So take it easy folks, be a little careful about it. Peace.

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